Going to the Hop! The Rainbow Book Reviews Hop!

By A.J. Llewellyn

I’m taking part in the Rainbow Book Reviews blog hop today! Here are the details – read all about it and make sure you leave a comment here to qualify to win some cool prizes: http://rainbowbookreviews.wordpress.com/2012/08/22/the-rainbow-book-reviews-blog-hop-is-here/

I am also offering up a free ebook to a reader – your choice – from my catalogue!

I’ve been pondering my contribution for a few days and have to say that I wanted to make this fun. I recently watched an interview where two matchmakers discussed the worst things somebody can do before a first date. Their number one thing was: don’t go to an event before the date then arrive with alcohol on your breath. That would be important, yes, but what else?

My friend Nick Capra, a retired gay porn star recently blogged about the pitfalls of gay romance. His detailed, insightful blog, Fear of the Fall http://pornstudblog.com/2012/08/21/the-fear-of-the-fall.aspx illustrates how love is love, fear is fear, starting over again, giving a new person a chance is the same whether we are gay, straight, bi, queer, questioning, transgendered…whatever.

One of my favorite scenes in a movie illustrating first-date-panic was There’s Something About Mary. Ben Stiller jerks off so he won’t be too overwrought before the date…with calamitous, hilarious results.

A dear friend of mine also recently did something catastrophic before a date, his first in several years after stepping back into the murky dating pond after a nasty break-up.

He emailed me suggesting it would make great fodder for a book and of course it’s already made its way into my latest WiP!

Seems he follows a gay porn star on Twitter who extolled the virtues of a product called Silver Sword. Said porn star is even selling it on his website. Guess this popular guy can’t keep his pecker up without popping these magic capsules that keep him hard all day. That’s swell if you are a porn performer, not so much if you are going on a first date with someone and you are stuck, yes, stuck with a raging and painful hard-on throughout a three-hour symphony!

I asked him what possessed him to do such a thing and he said, “I’ve been so bashed and trashed by my ex, I wasn’t even sure my dick worked anymore!” His date was a disaster but he said the massive event program hid most of his embarrassment…

So popping a sex aid capsule would be my big no-no. Don’t take dating advice from a porn star trying to get you laid – not trying to get you a second romantic date!

What about you? What’s your advice??? Best comment wins a free ebook from me!

Aloha oe,



16 Responses to “Going to the Hop! The Rainbow Book Reviews Hop!”

  1. […] 75. A.J. Llewellyn […]

  2. Like you know I wouldn’t be commenting, AJ, hehe, best advice, besides the alcohol and the “viagra” issues, for guys, don’t do that whole either sex, don’t do the flashy trashy stuff. No one wants to see fake anything from cars to boobs. If you don’t have it, don’t fake it.

  3. Gorgeous advice Elvira! I love you! Thanks for stopping by!

  4. illustrates how love is love, fear is fear, starting over again, giving a new person a chance is the same whether we are gay, straight, bi, queer, questioning, transgendered…whatever.

    As it should be! 🙂

    Oh dear, what a dating disaster! I’m afraid my worst date ever occurred when meeting someone through an online dating service. In the space of ten minutes I discovered that he’d lied about his car being in the shop (he didn’t have one and was embarrassed to say so), he bore no resemblance to his online photo (not even in the same decade), and was regaled with a rundown of his mental health issues that were the reason why he was unable to hold down a job.

    I confess, I activated my emergency ‘get me out of this’ option by surreptitiously texting a friend and having her call me on a fake work-related crisis.

    I don’t even *have* any advice for that poor dude! 🙂

  5. Oh Sarah…
    That’s a big one. Don’t lie and don’t use an ancient photo. You did great though. The ‘get me out of this option’ should come as a phone app I think!

  6. dating advice…there’s LOADS of that! lol but to be honest from someone who IS single and DOES date from time to time the WORST thing ya could do is talk about like say how AWFUL your past dates have been or any of the ex’s you MAY have. i REALLY don’t want to be hearing that on a first date. that and wearing THE most tackiest clothes..cuz if ya end up looking like ya be from the circus NO THANKS lol

  7. Please dont enter me into the contest I have Most of your books darling and as your personal slave wait servent.. ok ok ok whore and such I am pretty up to date….

    My personal Advice is honestly be yourself but different or lower key.. when i did the bar scene back when the dinos were around (15 plus yrs ago) My friends told me i had an Air about me that made me unapproachable. They said every guy in the bar knew buying me a drink wouldn’t get them laid… While i was honored by that thought it also made it hard for me to get dates and made me realize that as proud of myself as i was for being who i was part me of just wasn’t desirable to others.. SO while being yourself is ALWAYS the best tone down or dial back some things about yourself.. Make sure you dont come off as someone who will kick someone’s ass if they approach you.. Be the Best YOU you can be but one that someone will want to try and get to know..

    Ok thats the best i got for now..

    OH ALWAYS Carry Condoms, lip gloss or Chap Stick at all times and Girls Slut Red Lipstick is always a bonus when blowing a guy!! Just saying

    oxoxox Silver

  8. Thank you Silver and Laurie G! Girls Slut Red Lipstick? LOL love it!

  9. Slut Red Blow Job Red Etc So many names All leave a very Pretty Red Ring.. Unless of Course your Blossom then nothing touches those lips *cackles*

  10. I would probably be the worst person to ask for advice on a first date. My husband told me on our first date that he didn’t believe in love or marriage. I would suggest for all future first dates not to say this to their date but still I ended up marrying the guy so 🙂

  11. It’s been so long I’m not sure I remember how to date. OK, shopping for a date is like shopping for shoes, if you buy the cute shoes at the cheap store they’re not going to last, cheap remember. If you save up and buy the gorgeous shoes at Macy’s they will uglyout before they wearout. Same goes for dates, if you don’t want a drunk don’t shop in a bar. I met my wonderful husband in a bookstore, instant connection and so many things in common. The moral of my story is: shop where they stock the right merchandise for you.

  12. I know it sounds cliche, but just be yourself. I know you want to put your best foot forward on your first date, but if you keep dating, the other person’s going to find out what type of person you really are. So instead of trying to be something you’re not, just be yourself. The person’s going on a date with YOU, not Mr. Richy-Rich, not Brad Pitt, not George Clooney, you. So be you. Plain and simple.


  13. Wow – dating advise?? I won’t even go there with my kids or 8 grandkids. You see – back when God was a child – I was sorta in the dating scene, found the right partner in the second boyfriend. All I could do, as the non exciting, non partying – shy one, was be me. It was really all I had that I knew. So if the dating scene is anything like it was back in the stone age – be yourself and don’t change for anyone.

  14. I would say smile, be yourself, ask questions and have the attitude that it’s always awkward going out on the first date and that’s okay.

  15. Can’t really think of anything but enjoyed your post tremendously. The sex aid capsule cracked me up…reminded me of a hysterical episode of Queer As Folk, lol! Thanks for joining and sharing, A.J.!
    seritzko AT verizon DOT net

  16. Don’t have any.


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